And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
