I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize