I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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