I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
