I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
