You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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