I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he shaved USA in his pubs
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
MIDGETS
????
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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