I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize