I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
