There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
