A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
It's never too late to be topless.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
