I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.