that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
