I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
