He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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