At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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