brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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