I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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