was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
