I accidentally had phone sex last night
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
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So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
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All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing