And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
