I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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