They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize