official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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