I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
19 Movie Extras Reveal What It’s Like To Work With Celebrities
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.