The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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