I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
