u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
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Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
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It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is