don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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