it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
