Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize