What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize