When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
