I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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