Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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