Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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