maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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