when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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