someone get that fucking seahorse.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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