Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
