Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
