For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
