the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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