I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
