im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
