I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize