she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
