he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
