I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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