I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
