In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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