WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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